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30-Sep-2016 02:30

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In a previous post I wrote about some of the reasons women might choose to be sexual outside of their primary relationship.

Judging from some of the comments that post received, a number of readers thought I might be ignoring the other half of the equation—men who cheat.

In order to ensure honest responses, the researchers not only followed standard protocols regarding anonymity and confidentiality, but also required both friends to agree—verbally, and in front of each other—to refrain from discussing the study, even after they had left the testing facility.

These friendship pairs were then separated, and each member of each pair was asked a series of questions related to his or her romantic feelings (or lack thereof) toward the friend with whom they were taking the study.

Thus, we see that women are more likely than men to have an affair when they’re not bonded in their primary relationship (and therefore are seeking that bond elsewhere), while men are more likely than women to have an affair despite feeling close to their wife.

A nonscientific study conducted by Undercover Lovers, a UK-based extramarital dating site, may be even more enlightening.

And let’s face it, our societal distaste and astonishment over this particular activity may be a bit... (Sex outside a primary relationship, if the relationship is “open” and the rules are followed, does not qualify as cheating.) Interestingly, the reasons men and women engage in relationship infidelity are often quite different, with each gender’s motivations generally paralleling our basic understanding of male and female sexuality.

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“I am glad the Lakers took the step and the crowd roared.

(The highly misogynistic nature of a few of the comments suggests that at least a few male readers were I’d leave the men alone.) But now that blog is here. Men are somewhat different than women when it comes to cheating, and a lot of that difference arises from the fact that men tend to define infidelity rather loosely.